An Indian gay unwinds..

  (Sometimes random coffeeshops have messages on their doors meant just FOR YOU! Snapped this picture while walking in Candolim, Goa - circa April 2026) Yeyy, I am back! (with yet another r andirona 😆) I yaad karo this blog only when I hit yet another rock bottom I had no idea even existed. I have spent enough time down there wallowing in ' manufactured crises' one after another that I ought to get an honorary Geologist degree by now 😅 I realized a while ago that my libido has gone down significantly over the years. On the surface, I can think of many factors - Not really into hookup culture anymore, becoming more of a demisexual lately and low self-esteem due to not working out and feeling like a hideous slob. But it's time to face the (not so!) hard truth - in last couple of encounters I have had, it has been difficult to either get or sustain an erection. Now truth be told, my dick has been the 'biggest' asset. Let's just say while God didn't bless m...

(Fathering is not something perfect men do, but something that perfects the man )   On the first day of 2026, I was hit with a unexpected surprise. It is making me confront the deep seated fears that I knew inevitably will come to fore some day.  Every time I come to India, I insist on getting medical tests for everyone in family. During a routine check-up this time, there was some tumorous growth noticed in my father's report. Further steps have already been scheduled and we'll get to know more in the coming days. Medically, I'll be able to mange till the time I am here. But this whole episode (which has just started) has put the unavoidable, in the limelight - aging parents & what lies next. My parents have been a bedrock for me & my home has been my ultimate refuge. No matter what I was going through in the outer world, the idea of a home to go back to, have always given me comfort & security like nothing else. I quit jobs without anything else lined up, move...